Whole house vacuum, including furniture relocation, corners, and deep crevice extraction: 5 hours
Mopping of all non-fabric surface areas (approximately 900 square feet): 2.5 hours
Deep carpet cleaning for all carpeted surface areas and two large area rugs (approximately 600 square feet): 2.5 hours
Time to recover from cat urine fumes every time I emptied the carpet cleaner: approximately 3 minutes per empty x 4 empties = 12 minutes of my life I’ll never get back
Morale damage when I found my cats getting cozy with freshly cleaned laundry: -24 points, inspiring immediate panic, rapid pulse, and short breath.
Stick with goldfish, people.